Archive | August, 2017

Disturbed

24 Aug

In a word:
I am disturbed

Shocked
doesn’t cut it
Disgusted
comes close
Disturbed…
Barely scratches the surface

Subversive.
Flames thrown into the furnace
Patriotism turns to hatred,
rises to the surface.

We are a disturbed people.

Appalled, horrified
Despair
Waves of despair
Intensify our rage
Our collective prayer

For peace, for equality
In a society
Diseased by inaction
Let this be our
Call to action

Indifference

23 Aug

Indifference

neither love nor hate

Insidious indifference takes

no action.

Blind to injustice, indifference

insists on ignorance.

 

Our Indifference

seems inevitable.

It perpetuates

the status quo.

Society retains the

Powers that Be.

Seduces us to injustice.

 

My Indifference is

Insidious.

It creeps into my soul

Seeps into my blood

Insinuates, propagates

A lie: “You are without blame”

 

You

We

Me

Are flabby

pretending

weak-eyed Devils.[1]

 

[1] Conrad, Joseph. Heart of Darkness. Seattle, AmazonClassics, 2017, p. 16.

Search for nothing

23 Aug

Who am I?

Who are you?

I am on the road.

I found myself when I stopped looking. I was drinking lukewarm, black coffee. Coffee sloshed over the rim, into the saucer. I made 3 coffee rings, imprinted them onto the cover of my Moleskine journal. I pretended they had gotten there by accident. Three coffee rings feels balanced. I learned the rule of three’s, of odd numbers, in high school art class. Create the appearance of authenticity, of an accident of nature, by creating pairs of odd numbers. I wrote in this journal. I realized that by searching for who I was, by wanting to be whole, to feel whole, I would never find an ending or reach my goal. The goal was my journey into my soul. I continually change, every day. How could I find myself if the “me” today was not the “me” that was yesterday? Would not be the same “me” tomorrow or Sunday? I found that I could not be found if I was already here. I found myself when I chose to stop searching, when I accepted that there was nothing to find that I did not already have, that I did not already know.

Civilized

23 Aug

If I am civilized, am I free?

Or does society

define what freedom

should mean to me?

 

Civilization says: “We must survive.

Hand over your Self

your Soul, your Authenticity.

Do this, for the sake of the

Community.”

 

I want to be free

within Society.

How?

Maybe I will write,

say whatever I want…

but to be free

I must command boatloads

of Money.

 

So I’ll be Uncivilized,

I will be free.

Because I have capital,

I will pay to be free.

 

Instead of Society,

I’ll be a slave to Money.